Write about your strongest memory of heart-pounding belly-twisting nervousness: what caused the adrenaline? Was it justified? How did you respond?

You ever had the feeling of wanting someone dead before?! So bad that it made you upset that you couldn’t stop thinking about it. I was done so wrong by this particular person to the point that I had nightmares about killing them and slaughtering their body. I have came to the point¬†of realization¬†that it was only hurt and not hate that I thought I felt. I have never in my life had anyone to make me feel like pure shit before. It was in fact heart pounding and belly twisting due to nervousness of my adrenaline rushing through my fucking skull because I wanted no more than to kill his life. Although this wasn’t a boyfriend or a lover but it was someone close that hurt me deeply. So deep that I would walk past watching him get murdered before I’d help. I know that’s pretty fucked up but I’ve came to the point in my life that I cannot deal with angry emotions. They take a toll on me. Was it justified?! Yes and No. I felt like I had every ounce to feel this way but it still felt so wrong to be so hateful. I kept my distance only because I didn’t know for sure if this feeling was pure hate or just hurt. I was confused and scared that If I reacted impulsively that it would not lead to anywhere good.